Assertiveness can make a big difference in your communication skills. Being assertive can also help increase self-esteem, improve your workplace relations, and help reduce stress by allowing you to say no more confidently. As introverts, we can be at a disadvantage when it comes to practicing assertive behaviors. We, generally, spend less time interacting with others than our extrovert counterparts. While some introverts can be more naturally assertive than others, most of us have some catching up to do. That’s why I’ve put together this list of 7 ways to be assertive as an introvert.
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1. Know what you want
It’s much easier to ask for what you want when you know exactly what it is. Because introverts internalize most of our wants, needs, and emotions we can experience difficulty in putting these things into words. If this is something that you struggle with, you should take the time to ensure you can articulate exactly what you want.
2. Put on your Listening Ears
Admit it, you’ve rolled your eyes at this phrase at one point or another. I know I have, but the truth is it’s important. Ensuring you are actively listening when you communicate is key a key factor in being more assertive. To have strength and confidence when you communicate requires understanding the other party(ies) point of view. This will go along way when you are trying to be assertive as an introvert.
3. Don’t get Heated
Getting angry is counterproductive. Others tend to mimic your tone, and if you get easily frustrated you should take extra care to keep calm. You don’t want to undermine your goals by getting into an ultimately insignificant argument, it’s much easier to remain assertive when you’ve got a clear head.
4. Practice Saying No
Introverts have the unfortunate stereotype of being pushovers. This is because most of us would rather say yes and avoid a draining conversation or an argument. Saying no when you don’t have the time or the energy to take on anything else, is not only assertive but it’s healthy. Taking on too much, and not saying no when you need to, undermines your ability to get what you really want/need.
5. Stop Apologizing
Saying sorry when you’re wrong shows strength and acceptance. Saying sorry when you’re right is passive and weak. If you’re reading this, you want to be more assertive. The main reason people want to be more assertive is so they have the tools to express themselves effectively and improve their self-esteem. To reach that goal, you have to stop apologizing unless it’s truly called for.
6. Realize You Can’t Win Every Battle
Compromise is the name of the game. No matter how hard you fight, you won’t always get everything you want. But that doesn’t mean you have to walk away with nothing. Being confident and assertive means that you have the gumption to stay level headed even when you are fighting a losing battle, and to find a way to make an outcome that is amicable for you and the other party. Even if you have to make concessions that you don’t love, you should do so with tact.
7. Get Comfortable With Yourself
The key to being assertive is confidence. To have confidence you need to know who you are and accept yourself despite your flaws. Self-care practices can help tremendously with this. Meditating, exercising regularly, and eating healthy, will help you get comfortable in your own skin. This is biggest factor in gaining more confidence and learning to be assertive as an introvert.
Did you enjoy these tips on how to Be Assertive as an Introvert?
Have these tips helped you become more assertive, or do you know someone who these tips might help? Leave me a comment and let me know what you think, and don’t forget to share this post with your friends. And check out my post on Misconceptions about Introverts.